The word “fair” sounds innocent, but it’s often a warning sign. When someone says, “That’s not fair,” it usually means they’re feeling pressured or backed into a corner.
For example, a client says, “Your pricing isn’t fair.” Don’t rush to defend or explain. Instead, respond with, “What would feel fair to you?” That one question transforms the conversation. You’re no longer at odds—you’re working together to find a solution.
Arguing about fairness keeps you stuck in conflict. Asking about fairness opens the door to understanding. “Fair” isn’t universal; it’s personal. What’s fair to one person might feel completely unfair to someone else.
Next time you hear “fair,” pause. Instead of pushing back, get curious. Ask questions to uncover what’s really driving their concern.
The lesson? “Fair” is rarely about fairness. It’s a signal to dig deeper, understand their perspective, and turn defensiveness into dialogue.
